I have decided that 2013 would be my year of changes and betterment. I don't know if I'll pull it off or if I'd stick to my resolution but it's never to late to make that decision again and try.
Sometimes -- more often than not -- things happen out of our control and it's not even an implication of something we've done or are doing. Sometimes there are just other forces at work that interferes with our goals and future. Although at times we might not know what is going on or happening to us, with faith, God will show us truth and the path we should follow.
2012 was a tough year for me mentally and emotionally. Despite the smile I put on for the world, I felt like I was crumbling inside slowly but surely. I was beginning to fear that maybe, just maybe, I might have been going through a bout of depression. Thinking about it, I felt I am still too young to put myself through such a heavy and draining state of mind. But like all who've gone through a similar situation or phase, when it hits you, the world around you seems bleak. Hope was possibly the only thing holding you together. I was admittedly a complete wreck inside.
I'm thankful to Allah for blessing me with supportive family and friends even through times when I didn't believe in myself and didn't think there was light at the end of my path, I had support. Sometimes it may have felt like it wasn't enough but they were there.
Recently, some things have come to light and although sad, it's just one of those things that is beyond my ability to control. Looking back, everything made more sense and my instincts have been proven right. The only thing that I can do now is to pick myself up, push through and protect my loved ones.
Bottom line, never be afraid to seek help. Sometimes you just can't take on the world on your own.
2013. I'm looking forward to beautiful and exciting things this year. Insya Allah.
Insya-Allah. Everything will be alright. You'll get through it. You are stronger and a fighter. Don't give up. *hugs*
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